General Forum
Joke,,,,,,,,,,or is it?
I became confused when I heard these terms with reference to the word "service."
Internal Revenue "Service"
U.S. Postal "Service"
Telephone "Service"
Cable "Service"
Civil "Service"
Customer "Service"
State, City & County Public "Service"
Government "Service"
This is not what I thought "service" meant. But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had hired a bull to "service" a few cows.
BAM!!! It all came into focus. Now I understand what all those "service" agencies are doing to us.
I hope you are as enlightened as I am.
Internal Revenue "Service"
U.S. Postal "Service"
Telephone "Service"
Cable "Service"
Civil "Service"
Customer "Service"
State, City & County Public "Service"
Government "Service"
This is not what I thought "service" meant. But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had hired a bull to "service" a few cows.
BAM!!! It all came into focus. Now I understand what all those "service" agencies are doing to us.
I hope you are as enlightened as I am.
Which one ?
Would you rather have boring sex all the time or an amazing romp once a year?:
RE: Which one ?
Can't say I've ever had boring sex. I've certainly had some which was mind blowing, but even the worst wasn't bad. But, to answer your question; I think I'd have to take the boring regular sex as right after having the once a year great sex, it would be a real downer to know it was going to be another year before I got laid again. :)
anyone know how???
i know its very unlikely as its probably kinda hard for a program to pin point voice in a song and get rid of it...but is there software to do such a thing? the only way I know to do it is to get vocal remover which only lowers the vocals in the song...any suggestions?
RE: anyone know how???
I once spent hours trying make my own karaoke tapes but could never quite get rid of the voice. I could only diminish it by boosting the instrumental and lowering the voice to minimum. If you find out how to do it, I'd love to know. Surely they can do it in a studio where the instruments are recorded separately from the vocals. Maybe Charles knows.
RE: anyone know how???
Best way is with software such as "Audacity", which attempts to isolate the vocal track (not always completely though as some songs have the track mixed away from dead center making it really tough to pull) Without software it's fun but truly time consuming as you will find yourself constantly adding back. All this assumes you are talking stereo as mono can be much more difficult, if not impossible. Maybe others can offer more but this is what I have experienced. Cheers and good luck
.
RE: anyone know how???
There is a program called VocalRemover, The iZotope VocalRemover eliminates the lead vocal from commercial recordings while preserving the instruments and background vocals of the song. Might not be cheap though
RE: anyone know how???
unless you have the actual vocal track and can remove it, then you are left to the task of cancelling out the vocal frequencies from the recording. Results vary as you found out.
is there a pattern?
2007 - Chinese year of the Chicken - Bird Flu Pandemic devastates parts of Asia
2008 - Chinese year of the Horse - Equine Influenza decimates Australian racing
2009 - Chinese year of the Pig - Swine Flu Pandemic around the globe.
it gets worse,
2010 - Chinese year of the Rooster(Cock)-what could possibly go wrong?
2008 - Chinese year of the Horse - Equine Influenza decimates Australian racing
2009 - Chinese year of the Pig - Swine Flu Pandemic around the globe.
it gets worse,
2010 - Chinese year of the Rooster(Cock)-what could possibly go wrong?
RE: is there a pattern?
omg....its only one thing to do...check into a Isolation ward as quickly as hell... and hope for the best..
RE: is there a pattern?
omg i survived by now but how will i make it in 2010? thx for bringing this to my attention at least to get to buy enough toys before the sex-shops will be devastated by women ;)
RE: is there a pattern?
And I believe that next year is the year of the Tiger..... Other than that, your joke was great. :p
Am I gay?
I always thought of myself as a normal hetero man, not too experienced with the ladies but certainly not attracted to other men.
recently however I had two sessions here with rather charming and lovely transexuals (out of curiosity rather than attraction).
I now find the prospect of spending time with them at least as attractive as sessions with my regular girls. I have even been viewing TS porn on the web and I must admit I get excited by watching TS's wanking and cumming, in a way that I never felt towards men before. And I have started thinking of TS as girls rather than boys, as I know this is how they prefer to be treated.
So my question is as stated aove : am I now (or have I always been) a closet gay? Is it okay for an otherwise normal hetero man to spend time and have a little fun with transexuals?
Your opinions would be most valuable to me. Thanks for taking the time to read my post.
recently however I had two sessions here with rather charming and lovely transexuals (out of curiosity rather than attraction).
I now find the prospect of spending time with them at least as attractive as sessions with my regular girls. I have even been viewing TS porn on the web and I must admit I get excited by watching TS's wanking and cumming, in a way that I never felt towards men before. And I have started thinking of TS as girls rather than boys, as I know this is how they prefer to be treated.
So my question is as stated aove : am I now (or have I always been) a closet gay? Is it okay for an otherwise normal hetero man to spend time and have a little fun with transexuals?
Your opinions would be most valuable to me. Thanks for taking the time to read my post.
RE: Am I gay?
wouldnt say ur gay..just confused...go get urself a man and see if u like it that way u'll know for sure
RE: Am I gay?
if i was gay sure i'd offer but as im not it isnt an offer so u dont need to feel threatened and u can go get him ;)
RE: Am I gay?
your not gay...nothing wrong with watching a ts show and being intrigued, in fact i find it quite interesting, and different from the usual show that can be had here! also i found it to be a phase that i soon tired of, so dont worry enjoy it for what it is, and just go with it!
RE: Am I gay?
If you really want to test yourself. Answer this question. "If you had the chance to slip into the moist and steamy promised land of a absolutely fine 22 year old hottie, all while watching her breasts heave and her eyes roll back as she moans softly as you thrust your manhood into her, would you choose this or would you rather have a sword fight with a cute guy with puffy lips and breast implants?" Herein lies the answer to your question.. Good Luck
RE: Am I gay?
Maybe some guys do like anal but I truly can't imagine trying to compare jamming the old love rod into the "poop chute" vs. long stroking the hot and wet honey pot. Nope, just don't get that at all. Then again, there's the domination / humiliation angle I suppose. Humm, nope, not really interested in that either. Oh well, to each his or her own.
RE: Am I gay?
if im cuming better looking porno with a girl im a lesbo????but in real i prefer man..(girl me)
RE: Am I gay?
We have old saying here,,,,if you are pitching you are not gay,,,if you are catching you are. Probably not politically correct,,,,but i hate politically correct anyway :)
RE: Am I gay?
Are you attracted to other men, or men who look almost totally like women but have a cock? Is your fantasy with the TS's about imagining them in a feminine way (while they happen to have an interesting addition), or imagining them in a masculine way? Therein lies your answer.
RE: Am I gay?
Hi all. I was the original poster of this thread and I'd like to say a belated thankyou to all who bothered to respond.
For the record, I don't think I'm gay after all (but who knows?)
Thanks again
For the record, I don't think I'm gay after all (but who knows?)
Thanks again
RE: tell me why-y-y....
A guy dont have to cum to look nude - its relaxing look a nude girl just for fun
RE: tell me why-y-y....
I suppose it's a valid question, but I'm curious as to how you would know if a member faked a orgasm. Do you ask him to zoom in on the evidence? :)
RE: tell me why-y-y....
Are you sure you saw well? My viewers usually struggle to hold back lol. I have a few regulars that just sit, type and watch for a few minutes and the minute i ask them to w@ank, they give it a couple of tugs and cum on demand lol
I'd love to be like that ;)
I'd love to be like that ;)
RE: tell me why-y-y....
Four possible reasons come to mind.
1. They do so for the same reason a woman does. To give the impression they are satisfied.
2. Their goal is arousal . They are saving the "getting off " for later.
Maybe for a real life partner.
3. Their anxiety level is too high "get off" and they don't want to spend any more money in the video.
4. For whatever reason, they simply don't want to.
With that said, I will add one last thing; If it turns you on the see the "baby batter", I'd be happy to whip up a nice batch for you. :)
1. They do so for the same reason a woman does. To give the impression they are satisfied.
2. Their goal is arousal . They are saving the "getting off " for later.
Maybe for a real life partner.
3. Their anxiety level is too high "get off" and they don't want to spend any more money in the video.
4. For whatever reason, they simply don't want to.
With that said, I will add one last thing; If it turns you on the see the "baby batter", I'd be happy to whip up a nice batch for you. :)
RE: Happy Belated birthday to me! lol
all the best hun, hope you had great one - muahaaaaaaaaaaaaa
for those who watch eurovision
who is your favourite in eurovision?
and who do you think will win?
and who do you think will win?
RE: for those who watch eurovision
I don't know who will win but I certainly know who won't - the UK.
RE: for those who watch eurovision
PATRICIA KAAS the french singer will win. She is cute and good
Happy Birthday Pam
I don't have any special words t owish you happy birthday and the best in the years to come. No matter what name I give you, you're great!
RE: Happy Birthday Pam
''Happy Birthday Pammy'' wishing you more birthdays to come and more $$$$$$$$$$ and good health...... take care always..... kisses to you.....''
RE: Happy Birthday Pam
happy bday pammy hope u have a fun filled day with lots of love and happiness
RE: Happy Birthday Pam
Happy Borthday my dear friend Pammy!!! I hope you have a wonderful birthday and many happy times ahead. Boa Sorte!!!!
RE: Happy Birthday Pam
Pam...Happy Birthday!!! ... I wish you a happy birthday and many more...You are great
Have U seen german ants??
Have anyone seen german ant?? It's really big about 2-3 times more than our Ones :) I live with ants in my home.
It's really creepy. My previous tenant didn't tell me here are big cave. want to kill them all, but couldn't find any spray at Wal-mart. so I stopped up with tissue all those holes. One, I spoiled cola on my towel, and saw next day there are lots of ants. I think they come to with their antenna to find their foods. happend this morning again. xD just have to stopped up all those 1 cm holes. but wanna see how those cave looks like :)
It's really creepy. My previous tenant didn't tell me here are big cave. want to kill them all, but couldn't find any spray at Wal-mart. so I stopped up with tissue all those holes. One, I spoiled cola on my towel, and saw next day there are lots of ants. I think they come to with their antenna to find their foods. happend this morning again. xD just have to stopped up all those 1 cm holes. but wanna see how those cave looks like :)
RE: Have U seen german ants??
if u want to get rid of ants use ant poison,
ants are a type of species which when they find a type of food all the nest will eat from it and therefore if this poison is good it should kill all the ants in this nest....however you may need to apply it more than one time because there may be more than one nest or else new ants will hatch
ants are a type of species which when they find a type of food all the nest will eat from it and therefore if this poison is good it should kill all the ants in this nest....however you may need to apply it more than one time because there may be more than one nest or else new ants will hatch
RE: Have U seen german ants??
Ants in your house?! You probably need to give your place a good clean, spray some chemicals and maintain good hygiene and try not to spill sugary drinks.
Or maybe make them your pets, give them names and when you have a guest, tell george and johny it's not the right time to show up and to go back in the cave lol
Or maybe make them your pets, give them names and when you have a guest, tell george and johny it's not the right time to show up and to go back in the cave lol
RE: Have U seen german ants??
An easy way , if you don't have pets, is some Boric Acid mixed with cola, powdered sugar or peanut butter, placed near the holes. That should get them. If ya want to see the nest, you will have to put a tiny camera on one of the ants. :) Good Luck
RE: Have U seen german ants??
I can confirm the Boric Acid, it is also called Borax and sold with the laundry detergents. Works well for ants and cockroaches also.
Now if only I can find something to keep the mice out of my house, one day I expect to wake up outside because they carried me out at night lol.
Now if only I can find something to keep the mice out of my house, one day I expect to wake up outside because they carried me out at night lol.
Happy Birthday
Happy birthday to all that celbrate today, but a special happy birthday to someone i very much like imshy, kisses to you
RE: Happy Birthday
Happy birthday shy guy! (K) What can I wish u is to have fun, many secret admirers to stalk u :>o, aaaa yes a bitchy Mistress to spank ur little ass :d, Now serious I wish that all ur wishes come true and to be healty and live to love and love to live (i stoled that :D), follow ur dreams and don't look back, life is to short to live with regrets. Cant kiss u, ur secret admirers willh hunt me down :(; But i'll kiss u this evening :)) Anyway have to go kisses baby (K)(K)(K)(K) :D
RE: Happy Birthday
Happy birthday to you.... wishing you more free vids to cum hehehe..... once again . happy birthday..... kisses for you....
RE: Happy Birthday
just remember wayne, that all girls stop having birthdays for a few when they hit 29
Musician or dog?
The moonlight sonata, head bang??? Contemporary music must let you jump through the window then!! A little bit of Heavy Metal to cool you down?
You should rather watch the movie Beethoven ... referring to a nice St.Bernard dog :-)
You should rather watch the movie Beethoven ... referring to a nice St.Bernard dog :-)
RE: Copying Beethoven
I watched it. I thought it was good since I am a musician and knew what the word copying meant. It only showed a failing and old grumpy Beethoven. Idealistic in a sense, but boring in conclusion. The girl copyist had the talent to make it anywhere for any other musician more popular than Beethoven in that time. I didn't see her need to keep up with Beethoven's BS.
RE: Copying Beethoven
Lets hear it for Ludwig everybody .... :p
I never watched the movie, but glad you found it moved you ... hit the right notes so to speak .....
As for his music ... for the most part I think he preferred to push the technical difficulty for the musicians rather than emote. Even the famous 'Moonlight' sonata has to go ballistic in the third movement after the most enigmatic of openings .... dreamy inspiration turns to a bit of a head bang ..... still excellent but leaves you wondering where the gentleness went ...... its like wooing a girl and then getting the 'climactic conclusion' .... and slamming the door behind you as you leave with one leg in your trousers ..... nothing really wrong in that I guess ;) :p
I never watched the movie, but glad you found it moved you ... hit the right notes so to speak .....
As for his music ... for the most part I think he preferred to push the technical difficulty for the musicians rather than emote. Even the famous 'Moonlight' sonata has to go ballistic in the third movement after the most enigmatic of openings .... dreamy inspiration turns to a bit of a head bang ..... still excellent but leaves you wondering where the gentleness went ...... its like wooing a girl and then getting the 'climactic conclusion' .... and slamming the door behind you as you leave with one leg in your trousers ..... nothing really wrong in that I guess ;) :p
RE: Mainly wondering why
works both ways.....as soon as a guy logs onto yahoo not even contemplating goin into a vid he can b endlessly harrassed by a host askin him to go see her and if he says no then they whine and bitch...think about it ;)
RE: Mainly wondering why
Thx for this post! This going both ways is why it's so common for us all to log in as invisible.
RE: Mainly wondering why
why give your yahoo id to guys if you fell this way? just say no when they ask for it.
Well, that settles THAT
Congrats to ImShy and ThomasS77. You both nailed it. Hosty asked a question and basically tried to serve up and hit a tennis ball over the net...she was trying to aim the ball at the heads of the guys here...but both of you smacked it back so hard that you really scored the points. And won the game before it even began.
And they're both right, Hosty. Why are you complaining about guys wanting free Yahoo chats? Did you ever think that maybe...just maybe...some guys are simply trying to be nice and are genuinely trying to be friendly? And that's WHY they like to say hello or chat a bit on Yahoo -- you know, the way that REAL human beings talk to each other? What, are you SO consumed by money as a host that you have to get paid EVERY time you talk to someone online?
You hosts lose the right to gripe about Yahoo chats the second you CHOOSE to give your ID to a guest. No one made you do it...you could have kept your ID from a guy and maintained more of your privacy online...but YOU chose to give it out. So if you're ONLY here for work...if you ONLY want to chat for money and not to be friendly for a while off the clock...then keep your Yahoo IDs to yourselves and make all of your customers come to see you in your rooms as you actually work, so you do get paid. And you hosts also lose the right to gripe as ImShy said when YOU turn around and abuse Yahoo to hound us whenever WE'RE doing something online, and you beg and whine and plead to pull on a guy's heart strings to come and see you (so you can make more money) when he's obviously not in the mood or he's just online doing other things for himself. It's a two-way street. If you want us to respect you and your time when you're online and on Yahoo, then you can show us the same kind of respect.
And they're both right, Hosty. Why are you complaining about guys wanting free Yahoo chats? Did you ever think that maybe...just maybe...some guys are simply trying to be nice and are genuinely trying to be friendly? And that's WHY they like to say hello or chat a bit on Yahoo -- you know, the way that REAL human beings talk to each other? What, are you SO consumed by money as a host that you have to get paid EVERY time you talk to someone online?
You hosts lose the right to gripe about Yahoo chats the second you CHOOSE to give your ID to a guest. No one made you do it...you could have kept your ID from a guy and maintained more of your privacy online...but YOU chose to give it out. So if you're ONLY here for work...if you ONLY want to chat for money and not to be friendly for a while off the clock...then keep your Yahoo IDs to yourselves and make all of your customers come to see you in your rooms as you actually work, so you do get paid. And you hosts also lose the right to gripe as ImShy said when YOU turn around and abuse Yahoo to hound us whenever WE'RE doing something online, and you beg and whine and plead to pull on a guy's heart strings to come and see you (so you can make more money) when he's obviously not in the mood or he's just online doing other things for himself. It's a two-way street. If you want us to respect you and your time when you're online and on Yahoo, then you can show us the same kind of respect.
RE: Well, that settles THAT
I'd suggest that hosts sign-up for an additional Yahoo ID they can use for work. Keep your clients here on a business related ID, and your real friends on a private ID.
RE: Well, that settles THAT
I have many women's Yahoo IDs and guess what, I never asked for a single one, they all offered them first.
If I want to talk to one, I simple send a :) or something similar and wait until they reply, if they don't then I know they are busy and I don't bother them. I have a few who have become very good friends and we chat many times even when they never come onto CC. If the chat becomes sexy it is because they take it there.
If hosty is upset about men wanting to talk for hours in her yahoo then block them, and in the future be more careful who you give it to. I have had to block a few women because the irritate me endlessly begging for me to come to video, so I am more careful now who gets mine. Don't whine and complain about it, just take responsibility and block who needs to be blocked, and be friends with those that are nice enough to understand you work and need to not use it so much. But if you gave it out only to increase your business, well you gotta take the good with the bad.
If I want to talk to one, I simple send a :) or something similar and wait until they reply, if they don't then I know they are busy and I don't bother them. I have a few who have become very good friends and we chat many times even when they never come onto CC. If the chat becomes sexy it is because they take it there.
If hosty is upset about men wanting to talk for hours in her yahoo then block them, and in the future be more careful who you give it to. I have had to block a few women because the irritate me endlessly begging for me to come to video, so I am more careful now who gets mine. Don't whine and complain about it, just take responsibility and block who needs to be blocked, and be friends with those that are nice enough to understand you work and need to not use it so much. But if you gave it out only to increase your business, well you gotta take the good with the bad.
RE: Well, that settles THAT
Very well said! My yahoo list probably contains of more than 500 people all sorted in different groups with the names of the sites I met them. The common thing is they all at some point were in videochat with me. I only allow others to add me but never really add free loaders. Many tried to chat me up on the messengers but if you explain you are busy and hate free chatting anyway, they usually understand. For the more persitent ones the ignore button on yahoo is very useful because you only ignore them until you log on next time and they can always have a second chance :)
Needless to say I never asked anyone to come to my video. That's just not me!
Needless to say I never asked anyone to come to my video. That's just not me!
RE: Well, that settles THAT
I wont pay for normal friendship chat at yahoo only to see nude at CC. Many girls from site come to yahoo say hi and then ask go to prvt when im just online chat at yahoo and not visiting CC
RE: Mainly wondering why
Before i start my sesion in cc, i open yahoo for a lil bit ( to check mail, to say hello to a friend, etc.) When i decide to open my sesion i say to all my friends that i have to work and i close yahoo. Not only because is disturbing me while i work, but i try to give all my attention to my viewers. Thats i think is normal.
RE: Mainly wondering why
wow...finally some ppl agree with what i have written...i feel so honoured now *BLUSHES*
RE: Mainly wondering why
1. "Do guys feel fit to take a hosts time ...."
No one is able to "take" your time - you are 'giving' your time.
If you will only chat to other people for monetary profit - then SAY SO directly, and DO SO. You control the on/off switch for yahoo messenger.
2. We members are often being told how much a host "likes" us,
"very very likes" us, or even "loves" us. If those hosts were more honest - then we members would not assume this is real friendship or real "love". I never pay money to my friends to be friends - it is a mutually beneficial relationship. Hosts just need to be clear with the member about the nature of the relationship.
No one is able to "take" your time - you are 'giving' your time.
If you will only chat to other people for monetary profit - then SAY SO directly, and DO SO. You control the on/off switch for yahoo messenger.
2. We members are often being told how much a host "likes" us,
"very very likes" us, or even "loves" us. If those hosts were more honest - then we members would not assume this is real friendship or real "love". I never pay money to my friends to be friends - it is a mutually beneficial relationship. Hosts just need to be clear with the member about the nature of the relationship.
RE: Mainly wondering why
Why dont you explain that to the members who talk to you in Yahoo. Hi...I am working right now. If you want to chat with me come to CC and pay for the privledge.... I see this problem as self-limiting and you have total control. Block the pests and be done with it. Unless there are also regular customers at times on CC. In that case use common sense and be polite.
RE: Mainly wondering why
I havent been to many prvt without the girl already first time ask my yahoo id - why do that if dont want chat there?
Congratulations on the Champions!
Congratulations to you, Russian girls, who supported your team to the top again! Don't get all drunk in spite of holiday, we still need some of you! ;-)
RE: Congratulations on the Champions!
Lol thx, im so happy, even tho im not a fan oh hockey))) Was a great game)))
RE: Congratulations on the Champions!
uh oh.Monika isn't a fan of hockey. my high respect that i had for you just fell a little bit. lol
A simple question
Do you have a secret crush? And if the answer is yes do u plan to tell him/her about that?
RE: A simple question
Yes I do, and sadly no I won't tell her. I know the old cliches: "nothing ventured, nothing gained", "faint heart never won fair maiden" etc etc but her friendship is much too important to put at risk by saying something that could ruin everything. I know that sounds gutless, and I can't argue otherwise, but such is how it is:(((
RE: A simple question
I agree with you. In my instance, I greatly value her friendship and do not want to jeapodize it. She always smiles, but not in an "I want to be more than friends" way. I really want to hold her and kiss her, but friendship is even deeper than desire.
RE: A simple question
yeah i do and i will tell her eventually but i think u need to find the right moment and build up the courage to say whats on ur mind and how u feel and also b prepared for the rejection...and im well prepared no one been rejected more than me :D
RE: A simple question
glad i made ya happy...but now im kinda scared who u r..and why the fuck did i just tell someone i dont know i got a crush on them *BANGHEAD*
RE: A simple question
I do, but she hides behind a name which is but a cloud and cannot be touched and only tells us she is not really wicked. :)
RE: A simple question
who is not really wicked? and what cloud are u talking about, i'm wicked and i'm not hidding after any clouds, thou i love clouds very much :d
RE: one or two ???
I have never been with two women, but I would like to try. You 2 look incredibly hot.
RE: one or two ???
I like both ways, but sometimes I get a bit shy if there is more than one girl. It is easier to discuss my fetishes with one girl, than with two.
RE: one or two ???
BTW, which is which? Who is Julia and who is Victoria? Not really important; just curious.
RE: think
no idea but the last couple days i stopped thinking...now i think i might think again soon...u think thats a good idea?
Swine Flu
Q) What do you need to take to cure Swine Flu?
A) Oinkment
There is a radio station you can tune into to find out anything you want about Swine Flu. I tried it but all I got was crackling.
A) Oinkment
There is a radio station you can tune into to find out anything you want about Swine Flu. I tried it but all I got was crackling.
RE: Swine Flu
actually it kinda does coz it originated from the influenza bacteria virus found in pigs but developed into what we know now as "swine flu"
yes but not exactly
in the swine flu virus you can find a mixture of D.N.A of humans,birds and pigs....it is thought that the pig virus has jumped on humans and was mutating and mixing so it became how we know it now.
it is dangerous because the human immune system has never met such a virus and is not prepared for it but if you live in USA or in eurpe, you dont need to worry,all the cases that were reported of swine flu in europe have been cured,
Also reaserch has shown that the ammounts of deaths from swine flu was similar to the ammount that usually dies due to normal flu so dont worry about it:).
hope this little information helps
if you want to ask anything else i will be happy to answer.
it is dangerous because the human immune system has never met such a virus and is not prepared for it but if you live in USA or in eurpe, you dont need to worry,all the cases that were reported of swine flu in europe have been cured,
Also reaserch has shown that the ammounts of deaths from swine flu was similar to the ammount that usually dies due to normal flu so dont worry about it:).
hope this little information helps
if you want to ask anything else i will be happy to answer.
RE: yes but not exactly
but do not forget the last great flue 1919 came and went but came back 6 mths later and killed 20million in europe....so if it mutates which is the fear we could be all in deep pig slop
RE: yes but not exactly
spanish flu was a different type and it was considered a pandemic, right now swine flu cannot be considered a pandemic since it has not caused enough dheats from those infected....anyway its good to try prevent getting swine flu but do not let the media overpanic the citizens, this is the message our health centres are trying to give because panic can be more dangerous.
RE: Swine Flu
southern and got it but there's also this
further proof that O is the chosen one: they said a black man would be elected president when pigs learned to fly and here we are 100 days in and swine flu
further proof that O is the chosen one: they said a black man would be elected president when pigs learned to fly and here we are 100 days in and swine flu
Blonde Joke
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me.
I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.
She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.
He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns
to her and says,
"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to
assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."
He takes her hand and says, " Second , I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then .." he said with a deep sigh , ...........
"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."
I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.
She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.
He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns
to her and says,
"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to
assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."
He takes her hand and says, " Second , I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then .." he said with a deep sigh , ...........
"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."
new words for 2009
* SALAD DODGER.
An excellent phrase for an overweight person.
* SWAMP-DONKEY
A deeply unattractive person.
* TESTICULATING.
Waving your arms around and talking bollocks.
* BLAMESTORMING.
Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a
project failed, and who was responsible.
* SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.
* SALMON DAY.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.
* CUBE FARM.
An office filled with cubicles.
* PRAIRIE DOGGING.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and
people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
(This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)
* SINBAD.
Single working girls. Single Income, No Boyfriend And Desperate.
* AEROPLANE BLONDE.
One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.
* PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it
to work again.
* OH - NO SECOND.
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise that you've just
made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all').
* GREYHOUND.
A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.
* JOHNNY-NO-STARS.
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who
works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges
displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show
their level of training.
* MILLENNIUM DOMES.
The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing.
* MONKEY BATH .
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: 'Oo! Oo! Oo!
Aa! Aa! Aa!'.
* MYSTERY BUS.
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the
toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people
so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.
* TART FUEL.
Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women.
* PICASSO BUM.
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got 4 buttocks :--)
An excellent phrase for an overweight person.
* SWAMP-DONKEY
A deeply unattractive person.
* TESTICULATING.
Waving your arms around and talking bollocks.
* BLAMESTORMING.
Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a
project failed, and who was responsible.
* SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.
* SALMON DAY.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.
* CUBE FARM.
An office filled with cubicles.
* PRAIRIE DOGGING.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and
people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
(This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)
* SINBAD.
Single working girls. Single Income, No Boyfriend And Desperate.
* AEROPLANE BLONDE.
One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.
* PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it
to work again.
* OH - NO SECOND.
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise that you've just
made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all').
* GREYHOUND.
A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.
* JOHNNY-NO-STARS.
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who
works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges
displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show
their level of training.
* MILLENNIUM DOMES.
The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing.
* MONKEY BATH .
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: 'Oo! Oo! Oo!
Aa! Aa! Aa!'.
* MYSTERY BUS.
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the
toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people
so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.
* TART FUEL.
Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women.
* PICASSO BUM.
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got 4 buttocks :--)
RE: new words for 2009
Sorry Tisme... but not up to your usual standard!! That these are not 'new words for 2009' is given away a little by 'Millenium Domes'... a joke reference to the UK's year 2000 celebratory exhibition which almost everyone has forgotten by now!! :-P
I first saw this joke list when I was still at university... which is much longer ago than I would like to admit!! haha.
You posts are usually funny... don't get me wrong... maybe you just need a lie down? ;-)
I first saw this joke list when I was still at university... which is much longer ago than I would like to admit!! haha.
You posts are usually funny... don't get me wrong... maybe you just need a lie down? ;-)
RE: new words for 2009
Perhaps you might add the word, "fornipulate" the definition of which is; The skillful use of chicanery or fast talking to obtain sexual favors. ie; Before she knew it, she had been fornipulated by the handsome stranger she had met only hours ago. Cheers..
Happy Victory Day!
To all Russian friends and others who are celebrating on this day, congratulations and I wish you have a victory day at work too if you share your smile with un on cam!