General Forum

Can anyone recommend any beautiful girls with crisp, clear, high quality video? Some of the quality I've seen in pvt, is Arghhhhhhh.. painfully bad. I wouln't mind paying extra for it.

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whatever happened to the likely lads ???

I would just like everyone on this site to know that I am not a bitch either :(

I am an ignorant rude untrustworthy nasty wanker but not a bitch okay :)

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........ when you reply to a post thinking you are the first and when you click the submit button several other posts replying to that post suddenly appear :(

I am a voracious reader. I just finished a book "Behind Bars". A story of a female bartender in New York City. She worked as many top clubs and restaurants and made upwards of 1000-1200 per week cash. Anyway. She speaks a lot about how she cultivated regulars. Regular customers who came to the bar a few times every week and gave her decent tips were her bread and butter. She of course looked good, dressed provocatively, remembered things about the regulars..their name of course, their drink, their problems....she would always welcome them warmly and scold them a bit when they were away for a while. All in all she had a good 20 or more patrons who were good for 10 bucks 2-3 time a week. Reading the book...and it goes into more detail about the psychology and strategy of capturing and keeping a regular customer...I can't help but think that the host's here are really not much different. The names is different....female host vs female bartender but the games the same.... Any comment?

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Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he'd just been run over by a train. His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he's walking with a limp.

"What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender.

"Jamie O'Conner and me had a fight," says Paddy.

"That little shit, O'Conner," says Sean, "He couldn't do that to you, he must have had something in his hand."

"That he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin' he gave me with it."

"Well," says Sean, "you should have defended yourself, didn't you have something in your hand?"

"That I did," said Paddy... "Mrs. O'Conner's breast, and a thing of beauty it was, but useless in a fight."

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An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over. "So," says the cop to the driver, where have ya been?"

"Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk.

"Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite a few to drink this evening."

"I did all right," the drunk says with a smile.

"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms across his chest, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"

"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."

One day a little girl came running into her house yelling, "Mommy, I got five dollars!"
The mother was curious, so she asked her child where she got the five dollars from.

The little girl replied, ''Tommy down the street gave me five dollars for doing cartwheel while he sat in the tree.

The mother told her daughter, "Don't you know that Tommy is just trying to see your panties."

''OOOOhhhh'' said the little girl.

The next day the little girl came running into the house yelling, "Mommy, I got ten dollars. The mother asked, "Where did you get the ten dollars from?"

The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me ten dollars for doing a cartwheel while he sat up in the tree and laughed."

The mother replied, "Didn't I tell you that he is...''

Before the mother could finish, the little girl said, ''Wait Mommy. I tricked him, I didn't wear any panties today.''

Can you get better than a Kwik Fit fitter ?????

I just have a good sence of humor in many things, and all others it seems, have a good sence of humor only when its about speading legs and other stuff hehe

Kisses and take care
Anna

A young boy goes off to college, but about 1/3 way through the course he has foolishly spent the money his parents gave him.Then
he gets an idea.He calls his daddy. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe the wonders that modern education are coming up with! Why, they actually have a program here that will teach Ole Blue how to talk!" "That's absolutely amazing!" his father says. "How do I get him in that program?" "Just send him down here with $1000," the boy says, "I'll get Blue into the course."
So, his father sends the dog and the $1000. About 2/3 way through the course the money runs out. The boy calls his father again.
"So how's Ole Blue doing, son?" his father asks.
"Awesome, dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you just won't
believe this! They had such good results with this program, that
they made a new one to teach the animals how to READ!"
"READ," says his father, "No kidding! What do I have to do to get him inthat program?" "Just send $1,500, I'll get him in the class." His father sends the money.The boy has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out that the dog can neither talk nor read.
So he shoots the dog.
When he gets home, his father is all excited. "Where's Ole Blue? I just can't wait to see him talk and read me something!"
Dad,the boy says, "I have some grim news. This morning, when I got out of the shower, Ole Blue was in the living room kicking back in the
recliner, reading the morning paper, like he usually does. Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messin' around with that little redhead who lives down on Oak Street?'
The father says, "I hope you SHOT that damned dog before he talks to your Mother!"
"I sure did, Dad!"
"That's my boy."

Are you pro colander or anti colander?

Personally I think colanders are the work of the devil!

When I'm alone in my room sometimes I stare at the wall
and in the back of my mind I hear my conscience call
Telling me I need a girl who's as sweet as a dove
for the first time in my life, I see I need love
There I was giggling about the games
that I had played with many hearts, and I'm not saying no names
Then the thought occured, tear drops made my eyes burn
as I said to myself look what you've done to her
I can feel it inside, I can't explain how it feels
all I know is that I'll never dish another raw deal
Playing make believe pretending that I'm true
holding in my laugh as I say that I love you
Saying amor kissing you on the ear
whispering I love you and I'll always be here
Although I often reminsce I can't believe that I found
a desire for true love floating around
Inside my soul because my soul is cold
one half of me deserves to be this way till I'm old
But the other half needs affection and joy
and the warmth that is created by a girl and a boy
I need love
I need love

Romance sheer delight how sweet
I gotta find me a girl to make my life complete
You can scratch my back, we'll get cozy and huddle
I'll lay down my jacket so you can walk over a puddle
I'll give you a rose, pull out your chair before we eat
kiss you on the cheek and say ooh girl you're so sweet
It's deja vu whenever I'm with you
I could go on forever telling you what I do
But where you at you're neither here or there
I swear I can't find you anywhere
Damn sure you ain't in my closet, or under my rug
this love search is really making me bug
And if you know who you are why don't you make yourself seen
take the chance with my love and you'll find out what I mean
Fantasy's can run but they can't hide
and when I find you I'm gon' pour all my love inside
I need love
I need love

I wanna kiss you hold you never scold you just love you
suck on you neck, caress you and rub you
Grind moan and never be alone
if you're not standing next to me you're on the phone
Can't you hear it in my voice, I need love bad
I've got money but love's something I've never had
I need your ruby red lips sweet face and all
I love you more than a man who's 10 feet tall
I'd watch the sunrise in your eyes
we're so in love when we hug we become paralyzed
Our bodies explode in ecstasy unreal
you're as soft as a pillow and I'm as hard as steel
It's like a dream land, I can't lie I never been there
maybe this is an experience that me and you can share
Clean and unsoiled yet sweaty and wet
I swear to you this is something that I'll never forget
I need love
I need love

See what I mean I've changed I'm no longer
a play boy on the run I need something that's stronger
Friendship, trust honor respect admiration
this whole experience has been such a revelation
It's taught me love and how to be a real man
to always be considerate and do all I can
Protect you you're my lady and you mean so much
my body tingles all over from the slightest touch
Of your hand and understand I'll be frozen in time
till we meet face to face and you tell me you're mine
If I find you girl I swear I'll be a good man
I'm not gonna leave it in destiny's hands
I can't sit and wait for my princess to arrive
I gotta struggle and fight to keep my dream alive
I'll search the whole world for that special girl
when I finally find you watch our love unfurl
I need love
I need love

Girl, listen to me
When I be sittin in my room all alone, staring at the wall
fantasies, they go through my mind
And I've come to realize that I need true love
and if you wanna give it to me girl make yourself seen
I'll be waiting
I love you

And the award goes to...WTF! Of course, who else! hehe Thank you WTF for making me laugh with ur mean and inconsiderate but mind blowing funny words! Here it is:
"Look guys...pay attention. The purpose of CC is to get you from point A (horny) to point B (satisfied). Think of the girls as cars. Most are good, solid dependable transportation. Some cost more than others but that is life. Now some cars are absoulute crap...old, poor design, just crap ...you never get to Point B. Some are luxurious....really fast, beautiful and the ride is better than getting to the destination. Most as I say are in between...your mini-vans, your coupes, your convertibles. Something for every taste. Not too fancy but then ..not a piece of shit either. This girl....falls right in the middle. If that is your ride man.....god bless you. But don't bitch me out because I say I wouldn't be caught dead in your SUV and please...don't say it is a LEXUS when it is some old and busted Chevy. Ok...class dismissed."

Where all the asian girls today ?? SLEEPING ???????? WAKE UP WILL YA !!!!!! Feck ............

This is supposedly a genuine psychological test. It is a story about a girl. While at the funeral of her own mother, she met this guy whom she did not know. She thought this guy was amazing, so much her dream guy she believed him to be, that she fell in love with him there and then. A few days later the girl killed her own sister.

Question: What is her motive in killing her sister?
I will wait until you have thought what your own answer is to this question!!!!!

Please post your answers! hehehe.... will give you the analysis soon... ;)

Q: What three words mean small?

A: Is it in?

The husband store

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City,
where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions
at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the
attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch: you may choose any man from a particular
floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back
down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These
men have jobs.

The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and
love kids.

The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids,
and are extremely good looking.
"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have
jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework.
"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads: Floor 5 - These men
have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework,
and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the
sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor.
There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that
women are impossible to please.
Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.


The Wife Store

A new wives store opened across the street, the same rules apply.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.

The third through sixth floors have never been visited.

2 young lovers go up 2 the mountains for a romantic weekend,when they get there the guy goes out to chop some wood for the fire,when he gets back he says "bloody hell my hands r freezing".she replies "well pt them between my thight and that will warm them up"
after lunch he goes out to chop more wood,when he comes back he say "feck my hands r really freezing" so she says again "well,put them between my thighs and warm them up again"
after dinner he goes for more wood,when he returns he says again "my hands r really really freezing"
she looks at him and says "for fuck sake,dont ur ears ever get cold"