Spring Time Jokes
Sweatshirts
A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red "H" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we make love," she replies. A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a blue "Y" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when we make love," she replies. A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green "M" on her chest. "Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?" asks the doctor. "No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin. Why do you ask?"
Girlfriend?
When I was 14, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend. When I was 16 I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion. So I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life.
In University I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.
When I was 21 I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided I needed a girl with some excitement.
When I was 25 I found an exciting girl but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and flirted with everyone she met. She made me miserable as often as happy! She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some ambition.
When I turned 28, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground and married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.
I am now 31 and am looking for a girl with big tits.
Italian Spelling
A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but she listens in horror as one of the men says the following; "Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, dey come together. I come again. Two asses, dey come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a more." "You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!" "Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Imma just tellun my friend howa to spella Mississippi."
Hearing Problem
A guy walks into the doctors.
"What appears to be the problem?" asks the doctor.
"I think that I'm losing my hearing," the patient replies.
"What are the symptoms?" the doctor inquires.
"A yellow cartoon family," says the patient.
Funny Spring SMS Messages
Be cool and send these SMS messages to your buddies. You can also use a free SMS service provided by instant messengers, such as Yahoo Messenger, MSN Messenger or ICQ.
For Your Viewing Pleasure:
- March's Cover Girl
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- Cam Corner
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- Spring Time Jokes
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